Something About Happiness

This exact moment of time; I wonder and ask myself: how many time have I experienced happiness?
This thought that I have, popped on my mind after I read an article titled Don't Wait to Be Happy.

For 18 years of my life, I have experienced some highs and lows. I have been in happy situations but also in upsetting ones. I'm not that typical depressed-all-day-every-day kind of person but that doesn't mean I am happy all the time either. Apparently, the problems that I have sometimes make me feel like there is no happiness in my life and that I should wait for the moment when I could finally find my happiness. The truth is I can actually find happiness around me without waiting for too long.

Just like you'll only feel relaxed after stressing out, you also won't be happy if you haven't had any hardship appeared in your life. I now have learnt that somehow I have to look out for trouble in order to pursue and find my happiness. Recently, I attended my university's initiation for the new students. It was pretty tiring for me, mentally and physically. But then, the day when the initiation was finished, I got home, sat down, and thought, "It is such a relief that this whole initation thing has finished. But I think I will miss that too," which leads me to another thought and that is, "how thankful I am to meet some new friends and to be able to socialize with such nice people."

Get the point?
You should not wait for happiness. I now understand that along with problem comes happiness although most of the time it is hard for me to keep believing that there'll always be sunshine behind those rains. The thing is you should not immerse yourself into those stressful thoughts when you have problem, you have to reach the surface to get the "fresh air".

And now, to answer the question I asked myself before: I have experienced happiness for countless time and yet sometimes I still wait too long for happiness to come and I don't realize that it is actually around me. Thus, I need to be more thankful to be able to feel and realize that I actually already have my happiness in a lot of unexpected moments as well as places.

❤
Sunday, January 17 2016
6:45 pm

Untuk yang Tersisa

Rinduku larut bersama dengan pahitnya secangkir kopi pekat di pagi hari
Dilarung deras hujan yang bukan dari langit datangnya
Setiap jengkal tubuhku yang gemetar serta gemeletuk gigi yang memekakkan menghadiri senyapnya pagi ditemani sepotong rekognisi yang silam tentang sekadar eros
Sampai pada saatnya tuan Surya muncul, aku kembali meringkuk, mendekap serpih-serpih memori yang tidak ingin aku lepaskan.

Sabtu, 9 Januari 2016
11:45

Penyebab Tanya Sebab

Raung mesin dan [basa] - basi manusia
Membenamkan suaramu yang tergugu
Buhul-buhul sipu sebagai pemeran utama,
Sungguh piawai mereka kuasai panggung :
Raut wajahmu.

Lalu,
Kedua ujung bibirku menarik dirinya ke atas
Hingga sebuah senyum tersimpul.
Rapih dan perlahan menyatu dengan sorot mata[ku].

Lampu jalan adalah kawan
Jalan beraspal menjadi kerabat dekat.
Di antara mereka, kita menebar tawa
Yang bahkan menggantung pada ujung-ujung ranting pohon tak berdaun.
Malam menjadi saksi, ia titipkan euforianya pada angin.

Di antara bahagia,
Anganku penuh tepekur,
Membawanya pada sebuah tanya,
Samakah sebab tawa-senyumku denganmu?

Minggu, 3 Januari 2016.
23:33

Untitled

Dalam malam yang lelap
Dan sunyinya yang riuh,
Harapan menguap ;
Menjadikan dirinya kabut,
Lalu mengudara
Bersama gejolak emosi dalam kalbu.

Paling tidak,
Rembulan pucat gading
Dan bintang terhitung jari
Membuatnya lenyap
Meski hanya sekejap

Bukan masalah
Kalau memunculkan diri (lagi)
Jadi ambisinya.
Adalah sebuah garis;
Awal
Untuk meng-akhir-i mimpi
Yang merindukan realita.

/paham atau berusaha paham/

Sabtu, 2 Januari 2016
23:18